Overcome your Fear of Speaking in Public (Part 1)
Scientists tell us that we are born with only two fears*
1. The fear of loud noises (Ligyrophobia)
2. The fear of falling (Basophobia)
Take a moment to think about the things you are afraid of:
Spiders, Public Speaking, Divorce, Fire, Losing Your Job, Being Lonely, Poor Health, The Dark, Intimacy, Failure, Rejection, Taxes, Closed Spaces, Open Spaces, Dogs, Thunder, Mice, Snakes, Doctors …
It seems we now have a “phobia” to cover almost every situation. We have Aeronausiphobia (Air Sickness), Myrmecophobia (Ants), Motorphobia (Automobiles), Ballistophobia (Missiles), Cancerphobia (Cancer), Emetophibia (Vomiting), Xerophobia (Dryness) and Chionophobia (Snow) to name but a few.
Everybody Starts at the Beginning
Once you realise and accept that every fear or phobia you and I have (aside from the two “born fears”) is a result of “learned behaviour”, you can also deduce that it must be possible to “unlearn” a particular phobia.
Just because someone looks comfortable on stage, does not mean they were born with a gift of speaking or singing, or that they have always been at ease in front of people. You may be terrified at the thought of speaking in public (currently ranked as the number one fear in the world, second is “death by fire”) and so was I.
We do not like to think of ourselves as judgemental, yet everybody forms an opinion of someone when we are first introduced, on stage or face-to-face. Our first impression is hard to change once formed (and it is formed in the first few seconds) and is typically based on how a person looks (clothes, smile, clean, tidy appearance), on how they project themselves (body language, attitude, confidence), on what they say (word structure, vocabulary, topic) and how they say it (voice inflection, passion, enthusiasm).
There is an old saying “you never get a second chance to make a good first impression” and it is equally true today as it was when first spoken. To succeed in business and personal relationships you need to examine “how people see you” (confidence, personality profile, level of enthusiasm) and take steps to give yourself the best possible chance of making a good first impression.
For those of you interesting in improving your public speaking ability, here are a few basic tips to get you started.
One of the most important steps is to decide “who you are”.
The more I train people, listen to speakers, attend social functions and observe audience reactions, the more I realise the huge importance of “being yourself”.
If you are the kind of person that people consider to be quick witted and generally funny; then you should include some humour in your talk, otherwise be very careful!
The internet, speech writing books and well meaning friends will often advise you to tell jokes to win the audience over. On many occasions I have cringed in my seat as joke after joke falls flat on a very embarrassed group of people.
Let’s face it, some people are really good at impromptu humour and joke telling, and some are not!
Just be genuine, be yourself. Let people see “you”; it is great to “step it up a little” and press the boundaries of your comfort level, but at least try to stay within your spirit.
Additional Information:
Video assistance re public speaking:
If you are unable to view this video, please visit http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtL8gTEuwvU
Part 2 of this discussion re “Overcome your fear of speaking in public” will be continued in the next blog update and will include a “basic speech writing framework” to help you get started.
Text is original and is extracted from chapters in “Thank God it’s Friday”.
*All normal, healthy babies exhibit reflexes, i.e. an automatic response to an outside stimulus. These reflexes are important and are needed for survival.
If you touch or stroke the palm of a babies hand he/she will clench a fist in an attempt to grasp you and this is recognised as an inbuilt protection against falling. This action has been named the Darwinian or Grasping reflex.
Most parents will quickly notice the Moro (or Startle) reflex in their new baby. A sharp loud noise, or sudden loss of support for the child will cause the baby to fling his/her arms out and then quickly draw them back towards the chest, then they will cry.
The question as to whether these involuntary reactions should be labelled as fear’s is still in discussion amongst psychologists. There does seem to be a consensus that even though these reflex actions may be unconscious to begin with, they do connect to conscious fears as the infant matures.
